When we saw the trailer for this…. masterpiece, we wondered, “how the hell did we miss this movie?” Bitch Slap came out in 2009, was shown on only 3 screens, and faded relatively quickly into obscurity; this may have something to do with why it never made our radar. We stumbled across this bizarre-yet-sexy grindhouse style flick when looking for scantily clad women online important bacon documents online. Usually exploitation movies are set in glorious bygone decades, but this movie is very much up to date, and manages to work a number of modern locales and references (please note that this still doesn’t improve nor clarify the movie in any way.) I wouldn’t go so far as to say it’s a good movie, but it’s hilariously great-bad in its own right. The plot vaguely rotates around diamonds in the desert and Kevin Sorbo and sex nuns and the circus and razor yo-yos and a lot of random sword fights and the world ending. If nothing else, put it on mute and enjoy the comically hot protagonists gratuitously digging holes, scissoring, splashing in the water, feeling each other up, and running through explosions in various states of undress. Video clips and image gallery after the jump.
yeah, you heard that right: “Ram this in your clambake, bitchcake.”