Art of Man – Are We Struggling With What A “Man” Is?

It’s a fact, we live in confusing times. The biggest issue for many now is the issue of identity. Being trapped by the past, as well as being pressured by the future, the image of what a man used to be was, in effect, simpler. So, is it now harder to be a man, and what is a man anyway? Let’s try and delve into the issue.

Going Back To Come Forward…

In order to look at what it means to be a man now, we need to look at the older versions, was it simpler back then? If we go all the way back in time, we’ve got the hunter-gatherer, these men who did the physical activities and gathered food, the images we all know. Flash forward a bit further, and you’ve got the cool guys, your people like James Dean or Steve McQueen, these people who were inexorably tied to vehicles. But these manly men who have been presented as the coolest thing, are consistently in areas of danger, and is this even right? Racing drivers is another great example, someone like Ayrton Senna, the most celebrated driver of his generation died in a car crash, as did James Dean. The recent YouGov research poll showed that 2% of 18 to 24-year-olds describe themselves as “completely masculine.” This is such a low amount that it is barely registering. If you look at the pillars of male heroes now, who are they? Are they muscle clad heroes? Discounting the comic book heroes, we still have James Bond, but with this comes a lot of machismo baggage. Bond was borne of an era of specific archetypes, such as the hunter-gatherer, and the woman staying in the kitchen, and so forth.

Breaking The Tradition

It happens so much now, and not just in a popular culture way, we see sons confounding their father’s expectations. They are not going to carry on in a tradition or with the family business, as has been portrayed in countless movies over the years, they go to university, they go to find themselves, and so forth. And these issues of asserting independence, cause a lot of concerns, between the traditional father figure and his son. It seems to be that pushing forwards is causing problems for some reason.

The Changing Of The Role Of Provider

In the modern world, both parents are earning money, and there are still some people who take issue with this. But it is a necessity when it comes to living in the modern world, there are plenty of fathers that stay at home now, something that wasn’t even considered to be an option 20 years ago, and even 10 years ago. But a lot of people should look at the Danish model of parenting, where both parents get the same amount of time off from their work to spend time with their newborn baby. In this respect, a father and son spending proper time together, instead of the father going straight out to work, is fantastic for the child’s personal development. This completely changes the relationships between fathers and sons.

People Clinging To The Past

A lot of men struggle with their identity now, one of these reasons is because of what was expected of them in the past. Naturally, this leaves a lot of men confused, and struggle with their identity. Not just younger gentleman, but those well into their 30s. There are men out there trying to fit into a mold that doesn’t suit them in any way, shape, or form. It’s a difficult thing for men, generally, to go for their inner emotions, and listen to these. Even now, it’s a big thing to repress emotions, especially if they think that it is not something that they should do. The weight of expectation is something that is discussed a lot in relation to the modern man, and this has been hit upon in various documentaries, touching upon why men of a certain age commit suicide. The weight of expectation is a very dangerous thing and needs to be addressed.

Coping With Emotions

Again, this is something that, going back to older generations, wasn’t even discussed. The whole stiff upper lip attitude is very unhealthy. If a man was faced with a situation in terms of conflict like if somebody got caught up in an accident, or a robbery, a lot of men would seek revenge or retribution or something of that ilk that we’ve seen in countless movies. But now, we see people like truck drivers, to many people, the epitome of manliness, now get signed off with stress, and while a car accident lawyer can help in the circumstances, it doesn’t replace the mental scars. Going through a difficult time emotionally in light of a life-threatening event can have a long lasting psychological impact, but a lot of men just decide to get on with it, which is very unhealthy. This then results in years of repressed emotions, which is very dangerous. There are inevitably going to be certain problems in an emotional sense, as well as stress and anxiety which is very confusing for the traditional man in the modern world. And so if you look at the generation gaps, and fathers who had children who fell into that’s Generation X category, it must have been a completely mind-boggling thing to see. Their child, not being a traditional man, but being reticent, shy, and almost unmanly. But look at the Generation X poster boys of that time, the big one was Kurt Cobain, and to a lesser extent, Michael Stipe of REM. These people who are sensitive, complicated, thoughtful. These people were breaking the mold on what it meant to be a man. And these people are icons now. You then go to the heroes of the millennial generation, are there any manly men there? The key figures, especially in music, are people like Thom Yorke of Radiohead, or even Chris Martin of Coldplay. These people who were thinking man, not men of action.

Is It The Nail In The Coffin For Being Manly?

If you look at what is happening right now, the old guards, and people who think in that old-fashioned sense of being reprimanded for their actions, such as the Harvey Weinstein case going on right now. Of course, we all like to think there’s a place for everybody in the world, but is time actually catching up to these supposed manly men? It’s important to remember that history has been full of sensitive men also. And for some reason, sensitivity was viewed as a bad thing. But there have been plenty of writers and cultural figures who have not had a shred of machismo on them. And now, the manly man doesn’t fit in the modern era. If you look. Most men hitting the club on a Friday night, they would be classed as metrosexual, someone who takes pride in their appearance. Compare this with someone like James bond or Steve McQueen, are they relevant now? Look at the poster boys of cool now. Yes, there are rugged men, but someone like Luther, that character is more urban and edgy, not necessarily an anti-hero in the traditional sense. And now, the action movie, the very hallmarks of macho, has fallen out of favor. There are action movies now, but they aren’t the same as those ones made during the height of the cold war. But now, with the amount of building muscle programs, protein shakes, and the like, it’s got a lot of parallels with women and their own addressing of body image and body issues.

So What About The Future?

The future generations of men are living in more tolerant times, and this is great. You’ve got more tolerance for ethnic minorities, transsexuals, gays, and bisexuals. But on the other side of the coin, there seems to be a lot of people who are fighting against all this, from Donald Trump-inspired flag wavers to the people desperate for Britain to leave the European Union. So what is the message for the modern man? The thing is, age-old issues will arise again, and again. This is a part of what life is, unfortunately. There will always be people fighting against this sort of change, and now men need thicker skins, especially in the light of social media. But the man of tomorrow is a more well-rounded one, as millennials and people who have grown up with the internet have now different perspectives and more informed opinions.

The identity of what a man is now is not the same as it was 50 years ago. This antiquated notion of the manly man is nowhere to be seen anymore, and the more this can be communicated, the better. There are people trapped between generations where one idolized Steve McQueen, and the next generation wanted nothing to do with him, but this is the world that we live in. Ultimately, every man has to put up a fight now for what they believe in, and, really, isn’t this the real traits of a “man?”