That’s how most guys feel when a girl tells them she’d just like to be friends. The band Cake says “end is the only part of the word that I heard”. However, in this week’s article I will challenge that notion and suggest that it could instead be the gateway to even better women.
Sure, when a woman you’re interested in tells you “I see you as more of a friend” an auto response triggers in every man’s ego wanting to lash back and making her feel as unwanted as he does at that moment. At minimum, you feel like you just got a swift kick in the nuts. Take a breath, gather your disjointed nut sack and use your intellect to realize that this woman is opening up a fantastic opportunity to you.
Make the transition in your mind that this woman you had previously targeted for a relationship is now a friend. Period. Like it or not, she does not appreciate you completely and you need to refocus. Do not continue to pursue her, rather leverage the benefits of having an attractive friend of the opposite sex that is easy to hang out with. The benefits are many.
For starters, this woman is going to be impressed with how smoothly you handled this transition and will likely tell all her girlfriends about this awesome guy that just wasn’t right for her, but was supremely cool in how he handled it. Her friends are going to be naturally intrigued and will be elbowing each other out of the way to find out where this confidence comes from. Trust me…this will happen if you just stay the course.
Let’s assume that this woman is physically attractive, being that you were interested in her in the first place (you are a man, so I’m betting looks matter to you). Now this physically attractive woman will want to head out for drinks with you or invite you to parties where her circle of friends roams. When you arrive at these events you will have instant credibility with your newfound “buddy” as your wing-woman. You have a physically attractive woman who is out with you, laughing at your jokes, feeling and looking engaged in your conversation. Available women are always more attracted to men that are pre-approved in this way by another attractive woman. They will be wondering “what does this guy have that makes that woman want to be around him”? Use this power mindfully my friends.
An empowered man takes the cards dealt to him and makes the best play with those cards. Use what others might deem as a downer scenario to open up doors to new women that are going to truly appreciate you.
I’ve read several of your posts. I have seen things on the other side the fence being a member of the woman race, and what I can say at this stage is that I think one of the guys I’ve met has probably read your articles (and might be one of your disciples), and any guy who hasn’t most probably should. I realized that with some of your situational examples, if a guy acted in such a way that you described, I would have indeed responded positively. Now although I want to publicize your site, I don’t want to be identified as someone who is clued in to your somewhat “bro code” (although I appreciate the contrast from the more-popular douchebag version of that). For now, Kudos to you. As a potential target for your clients, I can honestly say you are on the right track.