Online dating has been in existence for over two decades. In that time frame, it has experienced consistent year-over-year growth. Approximately three-quarters of the singles who are presently below the age of 30 have used an online dating platform at least once. All these statements are not mere claims, they are fact.
Even so, there are still people out there who are novices to the world of online dating. These people are more susceptible to the uninformed voices that criticize the whole online dating paradigm.
You may know the sort of people that we are talking about — those who tell you that online dating is a waste of time. Those who constantly bring up generic horror stories involving some-one who met someone else online. Curious how it’s always a friend of a friend, never them-selves.
While online dating does not and cannot eliminate all the bad experiences that are possible on a date, it can minimize them and give you a better shot at meeting a person who fulfills your expectations. After all, meeting people at singles bars or going on that blind date that you’re Aunt Jane set up for you with her hair dresser’s second cousin don’t have 100 percent success rates either. At least with online dating, you retain most of the control.
So, Online Dating Is All About Control, Heh?
Saying it like that sounds brazen and would not be entirely accurate. Online dating is not in-tended as a tool for control freaks. It does, however, provide a powerful platform for individuals to control their destiny. Okay, maybe that sounds a little bit too romanticized and idyllic, but online dating does offer you the best method for finding compatible partners.
Look at it this way, when you meet people at a bar, on the beach, at the park, at your nephew’s bar mitzvah — you are getting but a small glimpse of who they really are. You don’t have the ability to scope out what they are really like.
Properly Leveraging Online Dating
To get the most out of online dating, you need to leverage it properly. This requires you to pay attention to the following key points.
1. Platform Suitability
There are literally thousands upon thousands of online dating sites. Not only are they numerous, but they are also extremely diverse. You can find dating platforms for long-term relationships, adult hookups, kinksters, swingers, seniors — there is literally a dating platform available for every desire out there.
This means that some degree of due diligence is required on your part to find the online dating site that is best suited for you. Not only will this offer you an improved user experience, but it will also allow you to make more efficient use of the tools and features offered by a particular dating platform.
Narrow down your search by looking at independent reviews of the dating sites that you are considering. After you have a handful of prospective sites, join those which offer free or trial memberships. “Kick the tires” as they say. If by the first week of frequent use you do not feel comfortable on the site or if you are not getting responses from people whom you would like to meet, then move on. Trust us, there are plenty of dating sites out there, several are bound to suit your needs.
2. Be Active and Engaged
You’d be surprised at the number of people who complain about the ineffectiveness of online dating whose only experience with the subject was registering for a free trial membership and then not too doing anything else.
For online dating to be effective — to not be a waste of time — you need to be active and engaged on the platforms that you join. Some dating platforms even incorporate your level and frequency of engagement into their matchmaking algorithm. In other words, those members who are the most active will stand a better chance of being presented to other members.
Even if you are on a dating platform that does not use activity level as a ranking factor, you will still derive tremendous benefit from being an engaged member. The more messages that you send out, the more messages that you respond to, even the passive action of sending out a few winks, will greatly increase your chances of meeting compatible partners.
Joining an online dating site and not engaging on the platform would be akin to going to a singles bar or nightclub and staying in your car in the parking lot and never walking into the place. How the hell are you going to meet people that way?
3. Optimize Your Profile
You have undoubtedly read many articles that have been published on this website, as well as others, highlighting the importance of your personal profile on a dating site. There is a reason for this — it is very true.
Your online profile — consisting of your profile image and your written description — constitutes the first impression that you will make on people. If it seems like you don’t have any luck in getting responses on a dating site, try giving your profile an overhaul. Check out some of our articles on the subject to get more ideas on how to spiff up your profile.
Don’t Forget the Purpose of an Online Dating Site
It may sound silly, but it really does happen. Sometimes there are people that join a dating site, do everything to properly leverage it, but never come out of it with an actual date. What could possibly be going wrong?
Nine times out of ten, the person in question is neglecting to ask the other members that they interact with for a date. They do everything else right — they follow the three key steps mentioned above to properly leverage their experience — but they just balk when the moment comes to ask for a face-to-face date.
Therefore, it is important to always keep the main purpose of joining a dating site on your mind. Yes, it is quite pleasant to find a person to chat with, but if you don’t get around to asking them for a date it’s quite possible that they are chatting with another person on the site who will ask them. As they say, “never lose your eye on the prize.”
Online Dating Is Only a Waste of Time if You Make It a Waste of Time
By now, you should be able to deduce that online dating — when practiced properly — is not a waste of time. However, if you enter it halfheartedly, ill-prepared, without a plan — you will more than likely fail and then it will become a waste of time.
If you are aware of how the game is played you will have an excellent chance of finding who you are looking for with online dating. Stop listening to the naysayers and focus on what has worked for millions of happy couples who met online. That will make it well worth your while.
